Tyler gave me the scariest Valentine's Day present today. He is growing up so much! He loves his music, picks on his brothers, and, recently, showed an interest in riding a bike. He is becoming a teenager with all the mood swings that entails. Mostly, he is just my sweet, loving young man. Today, he scared the total ^&%* out of me! (Excuse my punctuation!) Tyler is a child of habit. He always has been. I am sure it has something to do with the Autism and Down Syndrome. Other parents of a child with these diagnosis would most likely agree. When we get home from school in the afternoon, he follows the same routine: Go inside, goes to his room, turns on his radio, and escapes from his brothers. After a day of being in a classroom, he needs about thirty minutes of time to himself to veg-out. EVERYDAY!!! Today, we got home and I handed the keys to Logan so I could take our neighbor's grandchildren next door. They visited school with me today. The handing off of the kids took no time at all and I headed back to the house to surprise the kiddos with a special Valentine's day snack. (Okay, okay, it was just fresh fruit but I was trying to balance all the candy they had been given at school!)
Setting it on the table, I told Logan to go and get Tyler only to hear, "Mom, Tyler's not in his room!" Flying upstairs, I frantically began to search for him. I looked in closets, bathrooms, playrooms, ect....... Then, I flew next door and yelled at Janet to come and help me look. We went up and down the street, into yards, they whole time calling for him. It was terrifying. By this time, maybe five minutes had passed since we first discovered him missing. Logan ran in one direction up the street, the neighbors in another, and I jumped in the van determined to cover the most ground as quickly as possible. I barely had time to pull the van out of the driveway when I saw Logan running towards a kid on a bike.
Remember when I said Tyler has recently become interested in bikes? Yep. He took Logan's bike for a "ride" and was the next street over! I don't recall lifting the bike and putting it in the van or getting Tyler and Logan inside. I must have been in shock! When we got home, I sat Tyler down and discussed with him. I say discussed because Tyler has a new speech device allowing him to have an easier time with communication. It is wonderful! I explained to him he was not allowed to go outside without asking. He told me he was frustrated.
I am sure it is frustrating to my almost teenager to be so closely watched, even if it is necessary! All I could think of during the whole search was those parents who end up on the news explaining how they lost there special needs child and begging people to help locate them. How do you lose your child? Well, now I know. Never again will I silently judge those parents.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Happy Birthday, Daddy!
February 9th is my wonderful daddy's birthday! This is the letter that will be in his card this year. Since my husband has picked out his gift this year, I wanted to include this in his card just from me.
Dear Daddy, February 2, 2012
I wrote Mom a letter for a special occasion last year. At the time, you asked me where your letter was. I probably said something about getting you one soon. Truth is, your letter has been harder for some reason to write. It has been harder to put into words what you have meant to me as a dad. Let me explain. We live in a world where it is more common than not to not have a father in your life. When I look at friends I have grown up with, there are more with no dad or a dad they grew up only seeing once a month. In my classroom, 90% of my students live in single parent households and 40% of them have no contact with their father. (See how I used math there?!! Just for you!!!) You expect mothers to care for, love, and protect their children. The instinct is in our DNA. (Science reference!) For some reason, the same is not expected of fathers. Sometimes I listen to other people talk about the relationship they have with their dad and I can’t wrap my head around it. Isn’t it wonderful I can’t understand what they go through? The reason is you. You take your job as Daddy very seriously. I have never doubted your love for me. You have always encouraged me, protected me, and tried your best to help me. There are things I have done I know disappointed you. Yet, even when I knew you were upset, I also knew your love was still there.
Things haven’t always been easy. Remember when I asked you to help me with algebra? You wanted me to understand it so thoroughly; you took me through fifty different steps to get the answer. While I sat in the living room, near tears, you then said those words I will never forget, “or you could do it in two easy steps!” I got up, slammed the book, and never asked you for math help again. I still laugh about that whenever I help Logan with his homework!
You were involved. You drove me to softball, school stuff, and vocal practices. You took me to work with you so I could see what you do. I was “forced” to go to millions of Braves games and I really have lost count of all the UGA football games I attended. Truth is-you probably would have loved to have had a son! You never would have known it though. You wanted to spend time with me. I remember you use to take me out and tell me things like, “any guy lucky enough to go out with you better open the doors for you” or “if a guy doesn’t come to the door to pick you up, you will not be going out with you.” You set the bar for any of my dates. Do you remember when I brought home with the well dressed honor student with the earring? I remember I asked what you thought of him and you said, “He has an earring.” I spent a good thirty minutes going over his good points, awards, the fact he was kind to puppies and nice to his grandma. After I finished, you looked at me and said, “He had an earring!” And that was the end of that. I have never known anyone’s dad to try to get their grandma to alter all their clothes, prom dresses, and bathing suits to include a “modesty panel”. Seriously Dad, we weren’t Amish. You just wanted me to dress like I was.
I remember you tearing up when you first saw me in a wedding dress. When I was pregnant with Tyler, you told me you wanted a grandson. The doctor told me he was a girl and your response was, “We’ll love her anyway.” You were so disappointed. Then, when we went to the neonatal specialist and found out it was actually a boy, I called you at work and told you. You were beyond excited! You said, “It doesn’t matter if he has Down syndrome, it’s a BOY!!!!” Kristi and I joke you wished extra hard for that boy because thirteen years later and you are about to have your fifth grandson. How many granddaughters? Oh, yeah….zero!
Dad, you have no idea how much you mean to me. I love the fact Logan looks just like you. (By the way, if you explained math to him, he would love it!) I love how my impatient dad can turn into the most patient person when he is with Tyler. I love how Joey thinks Pepa is the coolest guy ever!
After all you have given me, how do I repay you? I go and marry a Ga Tech grad! Oh well, at least he doesn’t have an earring! Happy Birthday to the best dad ever! I love you!
Love,
Karyn
(The good daughter! AKA your favorite!)
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