1. When you feel intimidated, wear leather. You may be worried about the IEP,
meeting with a roomful of “experts”, and setting a plan for your child’s entire
educational career, but if you show up in an entire outfit made out of skin
tight leather, you’ll look confident. I
would even suggest splurging on some leather chaps. You’ll send an unspoken message. I am bad ass so don’t even try to screw me or
my kid! So walk in, kick your boots up
on the table, and confidently say “Let’s do this!”
2.
Have a
back up plan. Think of it as
insurance. “You want to cut the amount of therapy hours Tyler gets? You want to
put him in a class with 12 kids and 1 teacher? BAAMM! I don’t think so, sparky!” (I would not recommend using the term
sparky. It takes some street cred away
from the leathers. You get the overall point, however. )
3. Keep your plan a secret. Just when you are thinking, “How is this
delightful band of biker brothers going
to get out of this mess,?” BAMM- you are blindsided with an unknown plan in
place all along. How did you not know
Jax already had a drug cartel shipment on the side just waiting to go? Have your own back up plan secretly in place.
“You say the school can’t afford the extra parapro your child’s
classroom desperately needs? Well, perhaps if we spent those cookie fundraiser
profits on the classrooms instead of a new slide and school board “donations”,
we could find some room in the budget."
4. Enlist your gang to help. Did Clay go to confront his druggie
wife’s boyfriend all by himself?
Absolutely not! He took a
“brother” or two to back him up just in case shit went down! Have your own team of “experts”. Aaron and I did this when Tyler was in pre-k. They were trying to put him in a severe class
so they could get out of testing him with the rest of the students. We showed up to the meeting with 3 private
therapist, grandparents, a state board of education official, and a
psychologist. Before the end of the
meeting, Tyler was where he should have been placed to begin with and the
county officials were begging for forgiveness.
So fill up the chairs with your own people. Can’t find your own experts? I would suggest buying a van and picking people
up off the street as you head to the meeting.
5.
Never
show fear. Never Give up. What
would happen if the Son’s cried, shook, and peed on themselves every time
someone pointed a gun at them? That
would be a boring (and very wet) episode.
When you go in to an IEP meeting, keep your game face on! If you
don’t get the answer you want from one person, follow the chain of command
right up until you get what your child needs.
6. Remember who’s in charge. You are the parent. You know your child best. Remember that and trust your instincts. You never see Jax ask a random charming
citizen what to do about his club. He is
in charge. He knows what is best (or at least looks like he does in all that
leather. Take a minute to picture
it. Jax in leather. J ) so remember that
when you are dealing with people who have only spent ten minutes with your
child.
*IEP’s are Individualized Education Plans. Any parent of a special needs child has at
least one of these a year. They outline
goals and services for your child.
Love!
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